“Welcome to Estonia!” After spending millions of Estonian kroons, the wise people assigned with the task of coming up with a marketing slogan for Estonia were only able to come up with this exceedingly lame phrase. Sure, the eyes of Europe and the world will be on Estonia on May 25th when the exceedingly popular Eurovision song contest will be broadcast to hundreds of millions of homes. As last year’s winners of the prestigious contest, Estonia automaticallly won the right to host this year’s contest.

This is a chance for the small but proud country to shine in the spotlight. The year started off with a bang when Andrus Veerpalu won two medals including a gold at the Salt Lake City Winter Olympics, Jaak Mae chipping in with a bronze of his own. However, this achievement received little attention in North America, where cross country skiing is hardly a popular spectator sport. (Emphasis here on spectator: Americans are so sedentary, that their interest is in sports that they can view from the comfort of their well-oiled Barcalounger, preferably with a lubricant from the Rockies in their hand.)

Pardon the digression, but the slogan is beyond tepid. It is hard to believe that Estonians are unable to create catchy marketing phrases. Or is it that there is little interest in pushing the country to the forefront of international awareness? There is ample proof that clever, well thought out advertising campaigns have been successful in Estonia. Two that come immediately to mind are hardly surprising - one pushing Saaremaa Vodka, the other promoting A. LeCoq beer. This mirrors North America in a way, where beer commercials dominate the airwaves, hard liquor ads such as those for Absolut or Grand Marnier in glossy print publications.

Still on this vein, the humorous I am Canadian! beer ads that dominate sports broadcasts reflect a national spirit that is admirable, never mind whether you are a connoiseur of hops or not. The slogan works, and sticks in your mind.

“Welcome to Estonia” seems like something that you would sew on a doily, crochet onto a pillow cover, or heaven forfend, im print on a doormat. Where is the imagination? Where is the uniquely Estonian flavour that one expects?

When then-President Meri announced the need to find an Estonian Nokia, the message was clear. Nokia is almost synonymous with Finland, the most visible example of that country’s tremendous advances in telecommunications and signifying its poistion as a world leader in innovation and technology.

Many critics also assail the use of the name “Estonia”, as associations are drawn with the star-crossed ill-fated ferry ship of the same name that is resting deep in its watery grave in the Baltic Sea.

One other offensive bit, at least for this scribe, is the fact that the whole campaign was designed to find a “Bränd” or brand for Estonia. As North Americans know, a brand used to be attached to the rearmost region of bovines to identify ownership. Brand names evolved from this practice, and some even became generic - think how many times one asks for a kleenex rather than a tissue. The desire of Estonians to use borrowed words such as brand, when there are perfectly good words already available in the native tongue reflects a kind of inferiority complex.

It is understandable that English was chosen for the slogan, as it is the lingua franca of the international business and tourist community, the very people Estonia is hoping to attract. But as the title of this piece shows, perhaps Russian or Finnsh would have been more appropriate, considering that most tourists, investors and potential visitors to Estonia come from those neighbouring countries.

Is it possible, that there are no original ideas in Estonia? I find that hard to believe. I am hardly espousing a move to stereotypes (strong silent farmer having his beer on a sauna bench on Saturday evening), but one expects more from a slogan. Utilizing national symbols such as the chimney swallow or cornflower might have been an idea. Or legendary heroes such as Kalevipoeg - a greeting from him would be preferable to a doily inscription. Even our “Uncle mole” - mutionu - or a hedgehog could have been incorporated.

As “Postimees”, formerly based in Tartu, noted in a recent editorial, Tartu’s slogan, as a university city - “Heade mõtete linn” (City of good thoughts) reflects both its heritage, and the positive nature of its denizens. The noise around the choice of the slogan will not abate before Eurovision. However, one hopes that this is a temporary thing, that Estonians will look deep within to find a “bränd” that reflects the uniqueness of the country and its people.

Märkmed: